I am also pondering the question, but have not come up with an answer yet.
My mother-in-law asked a similar question about timing: how come it has taken so long for the issues to surface? My answer to the last question ,for me, is that now I have children who are of the same age I was in the early days of St James. I can see the marked difference in their Schools with their attitudes to the children under their care. Family and School life are both valued and balanced. There is a philosophy of togetherness with children, School and parents. Openess and equality are key factors and our children go off happily everyday to School. I am finding this very difficult to put down.
It has really brought home to me what we were missing at St James and St Vedast and SES.
I guess those who left just wanted to run away and not be reminded of their own hell. We didn't talk much at School through no playtime and no talking rules, so no proper friendships were allowed to be fostered. We were spread out through London, so geography played a part in lack of socialising after School. Add to that the amount of homework we were expected to do and what I guess could be termed a normal and healthy childhood was nigh on impossible.
I believed in talking about things and confronting the hypocrasy, others didn't. They wanted to keep their heads down and stay out of the firing line, which is fair enough. The system at School was one of divide and rule. Does anyone recognise the dynamic in a Family, where one child has taken one line of action and a following child has taken another, with the end result that the siblings do not talk to each other about the same problems they were encountering at the School?
Maybe the answer is that there are a number of people like me, who can now make a valid comparison between their children's School life and their own. Also, I would say this website has been a great medium for people to finally realise that they were not alone, really. There is a chance to heal and find ourselves and make those friendships we were deprived of then. For this I would like to pass on my thanks to those who are involved with setting up these sites (WATD and Yahoo).
Please excuse me if this has come out completely jumbled and difficult to follow.