Tears Roll Down
Re: Tears Roll Down
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Last edited by Shout on Wed Nov 22, 2006 7:40 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Celia - I have PM'd you on this.
Shout - I have stated before that first and foremost this is a site for healing.
Maybe you have misunderstood the suffering of others (including Celia and my mother) on this board. Maybe you do not wish to, or are incapable of understanding it.
Either way - I do not support harsh words on this site - especially when they are directed towards people who have suffered.
You have clearly suffered in the past and (from your deleted post - which I did read) continue to suffer. I truly hope that you can find a path forwards and that you have, or can find, people to support you along the way.
Best wishes to both of you.
Ben
Shout - I have stated before that first and foremost this is a site for healing.
Maybe you have misunderstood the suffering of others (including Celia and my mother) on this board. Maybe you do not wish to, or are incapable of understanding it.
Either way - I do not support harsh words on this site - especially when they are directed towards people who have suffered.
You have clearly suffered in the past and (from your deleted post - which I did read) continue to suffer. I truly hope that you can find a path forwards and that you have, or can find, people to support you along the way.
Best wishes to both of you.
Ben
Child member of SES from around 1967 to around 1977; Strongly involved in Sunday Schools ; Five brothers and sisters went to ST V and St J in the worst years
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Last edited by Shout on Wed Nov 22, 2006 7:37 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Shout,
To be clear, I am not calling for you to leave this BB.
I find a lot of truth, humour, and insight in your words. From time to time, in line with your moniker, there is loundess and harshness too. No problem with loud - just with harshness.
We are all in search of healing - that road unites us all - even those whose posts do not acknowledge this. I cannot tell you how to achieve your own healing, but I do feel that the BB has potential to help us all.
As someone who has experienced AlAnon, and observed AA, I can see that being heard without being judged can be very helpful to the healing process - as can listening without judging.
This is my personal approach. This, and working towards engendering it more generally on the board (and in the world).
This is not to say that there is no room for a fight. I do personally feel great alignment with your words around the responsibilities of those ex SES'ers not to simply dissapate, but to play a role from the outside in curbing the harmful effects of SES - in terms of the way it treats its currrent members (even though they may not see the need for help), in terms of the way it treats people too young to have a say, and in terms of its impact on the outside world. (I see Anton and Celia as very much stepping up to the plate on this one. Actually I think Sam has the potential to play a similar role too.)
I believe the strongest weapon in our armoury is love - love of ourselves, and love of each other - even when it is not reciprocated.
Best wishes,
Ben
To be clear, I am not calling for you to leave this BB.
I find a lot of truth, humour, and insight in your words. From time to time, in line with your moniker, there is loundess and harshness too. No problem with loud - just with harshness.
We are all in search of healing - that road unites us all - even those whose posts do not acknowledge this. I cannot tell you how to achieve your own healing, but I do feel that the BB has potential to help us all.
As someone who has experienced AlAnon, and observed AA, I can see that being heard without being judged can be very helpful to the healing process - as can listening without judging.
This is my personal approach. This, and working towards engendering it more generally on the board (and in the world).
This is not to say that there is no room for a fight. I do personally feel great alignment with your words around the responsibilities of those ex SES'ers not to simply dissapate, but to play a role from the outside in curbing the harmful effects of SES - in terms of the way it treats its currrent members (even though they may not see the need for help), in terms of the way it treats people too young to have a say, and in terms of its impact on the outside world. (I see Anton and Celia as very much stepping up to the plate on this one. Actually I think Sam has the potential to play a similar role too.)
I believe the strongest weapon in our armoury is love - love of ourselves, and love of each other - even when it is not reciprocated.
Best wishes,
Ben
Child member of SES from around 1967 to around 1977; Strongly involved in Sunday Schools ; Five brothers and sisters went to ST V and St J in the worst years
- a different guest
- Posts: 620
- Joined: Mon Mar 29, 2004 12:13 am
- Location: Australia
Celia - thank you for a truly courageous post - I beg you to please not leave because of 1 poster here.
Shout - have some bloody compassion will you? This family is STILL suffering because of the SES. Can you imagine how they feel???
How do you compare them with ex-students parents who are STILL in the the SES and dogardly see nothing wrong with how the kids were brought up and think their children 'whingers' for making any complaint?
Which parents would you prefer?
Celia was regularly punished for bucking the SES system - but isn't it a case of "thank God she did" ?
Please consider Shout - Anton and Celia are in need of healing too. What sort of arsehole are you being in trying to punish them further?
Shout - have some bloody compassion will you? This family is STILL suffering because of the SES. Can you imagine how they feel???
How do you compare them with ex-students parents who are STILL in the the SES and dogardly see nothing wrong with how the kids were brought up and think their children 'whingers' for making any complaint?
Which parents would you prefer?
Celia was regularly punished for bucking the SES system - but isn't it a case of "thank God she did" ?
Please consider Shout - Anton and Celia are in need of healing too. What sort of arsehole are you being in trying to punish them further?
Relatives with long-term involvement in the SES / SOP/ SoEP
Hi Celia, again.
I hope people can communicate here, and you are passing on what you want to pass on.
Keep in mind that Shout is one person, posting one person's opinion on the BB - much of it may be true and/or worth examining. Some of it may be conjecture. Don't be scared off by the aggressiveness of one person - just let it sit - but use your rights to explore this stuff further.
90% appreciate your input. Don't be chased off by a belligerent. Your words are open to criticism once you post them, but not everyone equates previous dealings with SES with the mark of Satan. Shout is rather quick to judge.
Best wishes.
I hope people can communicate here, and you are passing on what you want to pass on.
Keep in mind that Shout is one person, posting one person's opinion on the BB - much of it may be true and/or worth examining. Some of it may be conjecture. Don't be scared off by the aggressiveness of one person - just let it sit - but use your rights to explore this stuff further.
90% appreciate your input. Don't be chased off by a belligerent. Your words are open to criticism once you post them, but not everyone equates previous dealings with SES with the mark of Satan. Shout is rather quick to judge.
Best wishes.
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